Flexibility Has a Cost

Freedom sounds beautiful. Until you realise it comes with a weight that few people talk about.

We talk a lot about freedom. The freedom to work from anywhere. To choose our hours. To be our own boss.

But there is something I have realised we are not talking about enough: flexibility has a cost.

Last week, I dropped everything and flew to Sydney. It was one of those moments where life took over. My brother was admitted to hospital, and there was no question about what I needed to do. Within three hours, I was on a plane.

In between doctors’ rounds and endless hospital coffees, I ran a virtual AI masterclass, checked in with clients, and kept the wheels of my business turning. Because that’s the thing about working for yourself. There’s no out of office.

And yet, even in those moments of exhaustion and juggling, I realised something. This is the kind of freedom I’ve spent years building towards. Not the glossy kind you see in a brochure, but the kind that lets you choose your priorities without permission.

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The myth of flexibility

When people talk about flexibility, they usually mean control over time. Choosing when and where you work. But for many of us, especially founders and small business owners, flexibility looks more like constantly shifting pieces on a board just to make it all fit.

It’s taking a client call from the hospital car park.
It’s catching up on emails at midnight because you spent the day caring for someone you love.
It’s knowing that if you don’t do it, no one will.

Yes, it’s freeing. But it’s also heavy. There’s a constant tension between the privilege of choice and the pressure of responsibility.

And if you’re a carer, a parent, or simply someone other people depend on, that weight feels even more real.

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Redefining what freedom really means

For me, freedom is no longer about working less. It’s about designing my business and portfolio career in a way that gives me true choice. The choice to show up for the moments that matter most.

It’s being able to say:

“Today, my family comes first.”
“This morning, I’m resting.”
“This week, I’m travelling for someone I love, and the work can wait.”

That kind of freedom doesn’t happen by accident. It’s taken years of trial and error, and a lot of saying no to the wrong opportunities. These days, I only work with clients who value honesty, trust, and humanity. People who understand that life sometimes interrupts the perfect calendar.

Because the best partnerships, in business or life, are built on trust, not presence.

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The unseen cost of flexibility

The comments on my LinkedIn post hit hard.
People spoke about chronic pain, illness, caring for loved ones, and the quiet exhaustion of keeping everything running. One person said:

“We have flexibility, yes, but the mental load never stops. Thinking about my business hasn’t stopped for 22 years.”

That’s the cost.
When you are the business, you don’t get to clock out. The ideas, responsibilities, and to-dos follow you, even when you’re sitting by a hospital bed.

But the gift is there too.
I got to be exactly where I needed to be, when it mattered most. And in between the chaos, I had hours with my brother talking about life, what’s next, and what really matters.

That perspective? It is worth everything.

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Designing for choice, not perfection

If flexibility is the illusion, then choice is the goal.
We can’t control life’s interruptions, but we can build careers that bend around them.

That’s the real work:

• Creating systems that give us breathing room

• Partnering with people who get it

• Building businesses that don’t crumble when life calls

Because in the end, freedom isn’t about escape.
It’s about being able to say, I was where I needed to be, and I wouldn’t change a thing.